The Me Also Commission

Written By: Joseph Same

Since the book containing my tapes was published, Sharon and I have always said that we no longer wished to publicly comment, via any format, concerning any topic. We’ve (hopefully) left that part of our lives behind. Nonetheless, when Uncle Ralphie calls and asks…
You know it’s difficult for me to say this, but now that five years have passed, I think I finally have learned who “The Man Behind The Screen” really was/is. Yes, the phone rang that morning, and it was a call I’d often feared would come.
“Good morning Uncle Ralphie” I said.
“Since when are we on such good terms that you might call me uncle?” he asked.
“What do you want?” I asked of him.
“I’ve been asked to send you back to all those imagined places: Tempora, Windigo Island, Kwah etc., and also to many of those which are known as real in Earth One, such as Berlin.” “On no! Oh God no”! I said.
“No, I’m just kidding. But some new and very important adventures do await you. And you’ll begin to experience them as of this very second.” And with that said, Ralph hung up the phone.
And yes, though it may not always seem so, and although we may sometimes say it’s not true, Sharon and I have always wished to continue living “underground.” Yet, sometimes necessity mandates that we follow and comment upon what “goes on” above us; after all, much of it contradicts our beliefs, and much of it also threatens to end our way of life, if not indeed our own physical lives.
Oh, and I suppose it’s somewhat dangerous to say this, but many of us fear such a political party which has only negativity and the failed policies of liberalism to offer potential voters. And we’ve wondered how those potential voters would know who the party of negativity’s candidates are. But now, given what’s recently happened in the Senate, and also what’s now happening south of our border, it looks like they’ll know those candidates because those political manipulators will now be exposed for what they really are, i.e. power seekers whose only concerns are the degradation of successful Americans, and the praise and facilitation of illegal border crossers whose only wish is to live off the labors of those successful Americans.
But recently I (and I suppose as part of the adventures Ralph said would be headed my way) sneaked into a meeting of “The Me Also Commission.” And luckily I found a loose copy of the day’s itinerary lying about, and seated myself in expectation of the proceedings. The topic of main concern that day seemed to be whether a gentleman named Brett Cavendish should be appointed as city dog catcher. Yet, as the meeting progressed, I, having had a late night the previous day, and not sensing a great deal of importance in the discussion unfolding before me, found myself dozing off there. But, I remember some of the thoughts that came to me then in my state of “near sleep.” And in that condition of “half sleep and half awareness” I overheard most of the dialogue and testimony concerning the topics of loose animals and possible loose human morality.
You see, apparently Mr. Cavendish had been found out as having stuck a wad of chewing gum under one of the seats in one of his high school classrooms thirty five years ago, and the commission was now attempting to determine whether that action should now, all these years later, render him unfit to chase dogs about in the city. But I fell asleep completely then, and in my mind I was back then – many years ago, when everyone was certain of which sex he or she was, and when all abuse, no matter of what sort, was known to have been wrong (though that of course did not stop it from often occurring), and when left wing bigots didn’t try to stymie the freedoms of Americans, or flood the American territory with undocumented foreigners. Thus, what follows now are some random observations, some discussed at the hearing, and others generated within the mind of an admittedly distracted, but yet very concerned citizen of the United States of America.
First of all, unlike some political candidates, I won’t pretend to speak for everyone, but personally, I’ll say that people such as myself will always gladly step aside and give all the prestige accrued from the judicious use of all written formats to those who, through the centuries have proven themselves to be far better users of language than we. But of course our lives carry on, and we fear there’s not time now to publicly acknowledge all those we’ve come to privately acknowledge as great verbal and written influencers.
And, unfortunately for a number of years now the phenomenon of simply saying what needs to be said has consisted to a degree larger than it probably should have, of commenting upon, and then attempting to refute anti-intellectual remarks made by various mortals, but especially by leftist political hacks, and late night programming hosts, whose uncalled for, and sometimes vulgar comments have downgraded all Americans. Yet, we suppose some (perhaps many) have been fooled by those remarks. And probably some haven’t realized that all Americans, rich, poor, and, as is the case with most, those who live in between those extremes, have the same right to freedom; and, just as importantly, have the same rights of innocence and individuality. And don’t they have the right to live peacefully within their own land? Or do they have to just sit back and allow mobs of foreigners to illegally enter their homeland because they (those foreigners) are simply too lazy to work for a living within their native lands? Oh, and then it’s said that mob consists of refugees. But what are they refugees from? Why can’t they stay where they belong and work to better things there? Why do they have to foist themselves upon the working class of the U.S.A.? Don’t they have any dignity? Obviously the time has come for the U.S. to take strong measures against this assault on its borders; because if it doesn’t, in a few years it will probably have the majority of people who formerly lived south of the Rio Grande, then living north of it.
And if you think what I’ve just said is false, ask those from the liberal political party, who today are asking for your votes while they continue to make derogatory comments, if they’ll relinquish any of their money or positions of power so that Americans can import more so-called refugees into their nation. It’s easy to talk about how bad off some people may be, when one isn’t him or herself one of them. And from a protected perch behind a camera or microphone, it’s easy to spread hurtful and disruptive accusations across a land which really, when all is said and done, is nothing more or less than just another nation in which mortals strive every day to support themselves so that they’ll not be a burden upon those other mortals whom fate has seen fit to place with them as citizens of those states in North America.
But maybe a good portion of the problem we’re addressing here today has evolved from the diminished role of religion in modern day life. Today it’s all about how we can have a good time today, and little thought is given to whether or not an eternal force watches over mankind and will judge each of its members eventually.
And today, those whom a capitalist society has allowed to become successful are “set-up” as the demons of that society. And, some people even believe that it’s because of such successful individuals that the United States of America still to this day can’t protect its borders, or stop lunatics from murdering innocent bystanders at various locations – but especially at places of learning.
And after I’d thought about those things while being near to sleep, I suddenly fully awakened. And in a moment of stark fear (an emotion I sometimes encounter when crossing from one state of consciousness to another), I could visualize what it must be like to walk down the hallway of uncertainty, where all we should have and haven’t done is remembered still. And then I prayed “Please Lord, don’t allow haters, and people who’ll stop at nothing to accrue political power, to gain control of my government.” But the commission’s meeting was apparently nearing its end then, and I could hear the chairman then close the meeting with remarks which I recall as having been very close to those I’ll now share with you, beginning in the next paragraph.
“And, if indeed there is any veracity contained within the postulation that our commission has had any effect upon life as it’s lived now in the waning years before the onset of the new roaring twenties, then most likely that truth lies in the fact that our words “take no prisoners” so to speak. And whether right or wrong, or left or right, we say what we believe needs to be said at the time, as all good commissioners should do. But after we make our statements, we then of course attempt to “fade away” into the great society of melding, where it’s said that untold millions are still hoping for better days and better outcomes to come.”
“Oh, but of course the ever revolving wheel of time moves all of us. And, we journey on that wheel along with all we’ve become, and all we’ve come to know. And we carry our beliefs with us.”