Authors, Writers, Publishers, and Book Readers

Can description be too descriptive

In a draft, I will write what comes to mind. And then rewrite and take out the unnecessary description. Below is a part of a paragraph, I have been working on. My character is sitting in a car looking out over the property. Which I think is still over done...Let me know what you think and also how you prevent over description...

Carpeting the lawn was thick, green grass in desperate need of mowing. Tall shade trees were plentiful. Near the rear corner of the property stood a weeping willow tree with branches hanging to the ground, enveloping a small wrought iron bench. Potted plants in green containers lay close by. An old rusty storm fence standing with the help of tall grass and decaying posts lined the perimeter of the property. Scattered about the lawn were small flower gardens with red, white, and yellow tulips encased by circles of edging stones. A shed resembling a small barn stood off to the side. Sitting alongside the structure, leveled by a log perched underneath the tongue, was a sixteen-foot fishing boat on a trailer. Two chairs and an outdoor table stood between the shed and the house.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Anna L. Walls on September 1, 2011 at 8:02am

Help yourself, by all means. I do the same.

Permalink Reply by Matt T. Schott on September 1, 2011 at 11:10am

First off this is a well written description. I got the picture in my head of the yard. The only thing I might change is how the yard relates to the plot. Does the man in the car see his lost brother that use to mow the over grown lawn? Did his mother care for the small flower gardens? Did he plan the neighbor's death sitting on the bench with his wife? Describing the yard could be a desciption of the whole plot. It would be like a subliminal message to the reader.

Can the book make sense with out this section? IF it can, rewrite the selection so it is needed for the plot or to help move the story, even if its a small detail to the point of the plot.

I hoped I helped

Keep Writing

matt