Communication Skills - 3

SMALL TALK

Last week's topic, but a quirk of coincidences, leads into this week's.

Making friends first, discussing interests.

The third point sent to me suggested having a small talk script. I don't exactly what it means, but I might venture that having two or three pieces of information to make about topics helps avoid a long silence while struggling for something to say that doesn't sound like you're struggling for something to say. Or avoiding the opposite, where you're rambling and babbling the topic to exhaustion.

In my self defense courses, I urge the women to have two or three options for a given situation. If the first doesn't work or isn't effective enough, instantly switch to something else.

This might work with small talk. Have a few points and see in which direction the conversation is heading and choose one point that seems the best. If the opportunity presents itself, bring up another.

Sometimes you have to think fast on your feet. The talk may veer into an area about which you're clueless. What then?

This one is easy because I do this a lot. Ask questions. This is actually Dating Point #5 to be posted at a later date. However, nothing says this series of topics can't cross over into each other's territory...and probably should.

Back to scripts. Don't have a cheat sheet. Be intelligent, practice speaking and memorize your points to the point they don't sound memorized, but have a natural flow.

With my potential date, I would have no problem listening and asking questions. The few times I've been able to make my contributions, I hope I haven't sounded like a dork asking the cheerleader he favorite ice cream flavor.

Have you tried this? We authors have our speeches prepared for presentations and answers for interviews, but what about with a person of the opposite sex for whom you'd like to know better, say at a Cubs game preceded by dinner?

Who knows, she might go for that.