Hello Old World...!

        We get caught up in the stream of our fates, and we get too busy in the traffic of our lives, and we forget sometimes how special it is and how many aspects it has: you can see it once as this cruel prison, as these boring hours you spend trying to find a way towards stardom or success, or as an opened window from which light and hope come out… I discovered this truth on Monday, as we decided to visit an old friend in Beirut; and I begged my mother to take us to our old house, where memories are stocked and buried under the dust of forgetfulness… We arrived to our old neighbourhood, and I couldn’t wait to get next to the walls that built me, the ones that I kept dreaming about every single minute of the past ten years!!

          One of the hardest things I had to do in my childhood was leaving it all behind, so I can look at the ‘bright future’ and move on. But trust me, there is always a part of me in that old house, a part of my life that will never vanish, even if the whole place disappeared. I will always remember the innocence of my childhood, and the simple life I got to live in the past, when the boundaries of happiness were a single room, a small house, and a bigger conviction. I wish I could go back and live in the past, inside the memory that kept me happy all the years, I wish Life was that simple! I had to leave it after all, but this time I was pretty sure that my living memory is there to stay; and that I can come back any time to heal the brokenness inside me, the wound that life has put inside my soul, inside my conscious; and to make sure this is one of the magical secrets of our lives, a true corner of happiness that will never fade away unless age erases my memory…

          How can an old small apartment take so much space in the thoughts of a 16-year-old? All I can tell you is that it’s more than a house; it’s a living past, a materialistic form to my thoughts, and a place I can call home! Maybe I didn’t use to appreciate my life back when I was a child, but my visit that day made me realize that my life actually had a meaning. It limited my vision in a way that it made it more specific and clear to what I was born to represent. It was an influence to a bigger treasure; the one that offers your conscious a special memory from the past and a unique hope for the beautiful planned future! I got to stop in front of the building where my apartment rested. I looked at my entourage to find that everything got smaller: the road, the building, the stairs, and even the front gate… As I went inside, I smelt on every floor a different sent, each one transported me to the world of innocence, to the simpler days, and made me realize how much I miss the place of my birth. How precious and dear to walk on these stairs again, the ones that carried me silently back in the days…

          As I was going on, I became closer to a special door, a corner that I waited so long to stand in front of! I unlocked the old wooden door with my mother’s keys. She waited for me in the car, while I was walking inside the house. I felt in this second the paroxysm of my happiness. I felt like all the elements of the house were calling my name, pulling me to every diamond inside. My sight first landed on the old frame that had my photo in it hanging on the wall. I was looking simply everywhere, trying to steal the moment, in order to have more time to discover what was hidden from my life! The old dream of mine became the only truth when I checked all the rooms, the kitchen and even the restroom. I had my hand on all the walls that whispered my name; it was the love that I could surrender to… forever!

          But I had to rush back to our car; I didn’t have time enough… My mom was waiting; she had to take me back! A glance, one single moment of enjoyment… nothing more! However, the special visit of that day, even if it was short and fast, made me realize that everything I was scared of was a lie, it was like I was born again, like I changed, with the help of my satisfaction to become the man that knew everything he needed to understand the mystery in his life. It was the key that uncovered one of the most precious secrets in the world, to take him to a long trip to the world of childhood, and to the land of dreams, where he moved, thought, walked, and grew, and left soon after he started to know that life is a series of complications and meaningful emptiness…